Every time people asked me how today was going my answer was always, "It has been a strange day." I'm not sure why I kept saying that as the response because the two or three little stories I told to go along with the day didn't really categorize it as strange. But I kept feeling like this was a strange birthday. And now it is official.
My dad tried to get in touch with me today. This is a long story and I'm not going to go into the details, but just to give a very brief overview my dad lives in another country and I haven't really heard from him since I was in high school. My mom and I moved back to the US when I was a toddler. I always wondered whether he thought of me and every once in a while I would have a strong urge to contact him, but I don't speak the language and I didn't ever really feel ready emotionally.
He called my mom today and left a message which included his phone number. Not even three days ago, I did a Google search for him and mused on the idea of contacting him. And now here I am. The time is now. And I'm not sure I'm ready. I'm scared and I don't know why. I'm crying and I don't know why. But I'm going to try to get myself in order and see if I can do it.
What a strange birthday it has been.