Change Sucks

So hello.  I am writing this from the Teahouse down the street because they have free wi-fi.  That's because I do NOT have internet yet.  U-Verse said they could service my apartment, but once they showed up they discovered that they really couldn't.  By the time I went crawling back to Comcast the only date they had available was for this Wednesday.  That will put me at 10 days of no internet.  10 days.  You know how I am about the internet right?  If I didn't have my phone I would have already gone insane.

After all the planning I did, and I did a lot, this was NOT a smooth move in so many ways.  I know that planning does not guarantee ease in something big like a move, but still.  I'd like to say that I have calmed down somewhat from my earlier hysterical state, but I'm not entirely sure.  I am having a very hard time adjusting to my new location.  I feel like I'm living in a strangers house or in a hotel room and that is not helping.  I am surprised that it is taking me so long to get used to a new place since I have the same bed and same sofa and same furniture.  It is amazing the difference that four walls can make.  

I am also having a very hard time with the air conditioner.  Where to start.  The vents are in two rooms, living and bedroom, and they are in the ceiling and blow straight down versus being in the wall and blowing out.  That may not seem like a big deal, but the first night I found myself lying in the stream of constantly blowing air and I could not sleep.  I had to rearrange all my bedroom furniture the second day and that was no easy task since I had spent most of the first day filling up the dresser.  

The air conditioner seems to run all the time even though I don't have it set low.  At all.  Like 78-80.  It isn't uncomfortable but it certainly isn't cold and I like it cold.  Guess I'll have to change that.  I am concerned about having to pay a huge bill so that is why I have it up.  I knew the bill would be higher because I was now living on the second floor with a wall full of windows, but it just seems to struggle to get to 78.  Of course I am going into the three hottest months in Houston so it will be a challenge.  I think things will be ok, but I won't know for sure until I get my first electricity bill and I'm scared it is going to be outrageous and I'm not going to be able to pay it.  Of course I won't know for a month so that is just a month for me to worry and fret.

But the biggest issue is the vibration and hum.  The air conditioner is on the roof and I am on the second floor so it is right above my bedroom.  It has a low vibration and hum that is very distracting to me.  I am sure other people wouldn't even notice it, but I do and it is stressing me out a great deal.  People have been telling me that I will get used to it after time, but in the meantime I have to wear earplugs to sleep, I'm not sleeping well and I hear it all the time.  I tense up when it kicks on because part of my brain is thinking again, you are on again and part of my brain is reacting to the hum.  I know, KNOW, that if I brought somebody in they wouldn't think it is that loud so I'm not exactly sure how to approach management.  I think there isn't a lot they will be able to do and that is depressing.  I pray I get used to it because right now I am already plotting about how to move next summer and that makes me so sad.  I waited 15 years for this move, just got here and I'm miserable.  I hear other neighbors air conditioners so again I think it is a me thing which makes it doubly frustrating.  If I could just block it out or not be such a wound up ball of nerves.  

I don't know what is going to happen.  In a month I could be perfectly happy.  I'm not sure how much of this is that I am not comfortable yet in the space, how much is the fact that I still don't have internet (EEEK!!!) and how much is the sound being too loud.  Only time will tell, but I hate waiting for time.  The older I get the less patience I have.  

Hopefully my next post will be happier.  Or at least from my own sofa.

Find a grocery store

Notes to my future self